Standardized Reply

Dear:

CluelessNewbie	Lamer	Flamer
Loser	Spammer	Troller
"Me too" er	Pervert	Geek
Freak	Nerd	Elvis
Racist	Fed	Freak
Fundamentalist	Satanist	Homeopath
Unbearably self-righteous person

I took exception to your recent:

Post to

(Newsgroup)

It was (check all that apply):

Lame	Stupid	Abusive
Clueless	Idiotic	Brain-damaged
Imbecilic	Arrogant	Malevolent
Contemptible	Libelous	Ignorant
Clueless	Stupid	Fundamentalist
Boring	Dim	Cowardly
Deceitful	Demented	Self-righteous
Crazy	Weird	Hypocritical
Loathsome	Satanic	Despicable
Belligerent	Mind numbing	Maladroit
Much longer than any worthwhile thought of which you may be capable.

Your attention is drawn to the fact that:

	You posted what should have been emailed
	You obviously don't know how to read your newsgroups line
	You are trying to make money on a non-commercial newsgroup
	You self-righteously impose your religious beliefs on others
	You self-righteously impose your racial beliefs on others
	You posted a binary in a non-binaries group
	You don't know which group to post in
	You posted something totally uninteresting
	You crossposted to way too many newsgroups
	I don't like your tone of voice
	What you posted has been done before.
	Not only that, it was also done better the last time.
	You quoted an entire post in your reply
	You started a long, stupid thread
	You continued spreading a long stupid thread
	Your post is absurdly off topic for where you posted it
	You posted a followup to crossposted robot-generated spam
	You posted a "test" in a discussion group rather than in alt.test
	You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
	You posted low-IQ flamebait
	You posted a blatantly obvious troll
	You followed up to a blatantly obvious troll
	You said "me too" to something
	You make no sense
	Your sig/alias is dreadful
	You must have spent your life in a skinner box to be this clueless.
	You posted a phone-sex ad
	You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme
	You claimed a pyramid-scheme/chain letter for money was legal
	Your margin settings (or lack of) make your post unreadable. Each line just goes on and on, not stopping at 75 characters, making it hard to read.
	You posted in ELitE CaPitALs to look k0OwL
	You posted a message in ALL CAPS, and you don't even own a TRS-80
	Your post was FULL of RANDOM CAPS for NO APPARENT REASON
	You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of this newsgroup.
	You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of the Internet.
	You are a loser.
	This has been pointed out to you before.
	You didn't do anything specific, but appear to be so generally worthless that you are being flamed on general principles.

It is recommended that you:

In Closing, I'd Like to Say:

	You need to seek psychiatric help
	Take your gibberish somewhere else
	plonk
	Learn how to post or get off the usenet
	Most of the above
	All of the above
	Some of the above, not including All of the above
	You are so clueless that I didn't even bother filling in this form.

(check all boxes that apply)

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W3CHTML 5.0 W3C CSS

	Get a clue
	Get a life
	Go away
	Grow up
	Never post again
	Read every newsgroup you posted to for a week
	stop reading Usenet news and get a life
	stop sending Email and get a life
	Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
	Have your medication adjusted
	Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
	find a volcano and throw yourself in
	get a gun and shoot yourself
	Actually post something relevant
	Read the FAQ
	stick to FidoNet and come back when you've grown up
	Apologize to everybody in this newsgroup
	consume excrement
	consume excrement and thus expire
	Post your tests to alt.test/misc.test
	Put your home phone number in your ads from now on
	Refrain from posting until you have a vague idea what you're doing